"Once you start recognizing the truth of your story, finish the story. It happened but you're still here, you're still capable, powerful, you're not your circumstance. It happened and you made it through. You're still fully equipped with every single tool you need to fulfill your purpose."
A twenty year old young lady who is wise beyond her years read me this quote at my graduation this past week. For quite sometime I was in denial about the truth of my story. Struggles and dark days did happen, but I am still capable and powerful. I did make it through, regardless of the days I called home begging my mom to come save me. More often than not, I forget that I am fully equipped with tools and a a purpose; they were just lost for awhile.
My therapist and I joke about my first day at RCC, even though at the time it was the most traumatic day of my life. After she showed me the food pantry I threw a pretty impressive temper tantrum and I tried to chase after my parents as they drove out of the parking lot. Honestly, I didn't think it was possible for me to make it through the program. I don't remember much about that first day, or the entire first week, except that I could not stop crying. At first I was furious that isolation wasn't allowed, but after a few weeks I became fearful of missing out on any fun my fellow patients were having.
My therapist and I joke about my first day at RCC, even though at the time it was the most traumatic day of my life. After she showed me the food pantry I threw a pretty impressive temper tantrum and I tried to chase after my parents as they drove out of the parking lot. Honestly, I didn't think it was possible for me to make it through the program. I don't remember much about that first day, or the entire first week, except that I could not stop crying. At first I was furious that isolation wasn't allowed, but after a few weeks I became fearful of missing out on any fun my fellow patients were having.
Never in my wildest dreams did I expect to spend my entire 24th summer in a treatment facility. My parents dropped me off kicking and screaming, but ironically after 16 weeks I am ready to move in and stay forever. I made some life long friends, regained my passion for life, found my sense of self, learned to enjoy food again, developed goals for the future, discovered my true passion, and most importantly have been given a second chance at life.
It has been a rough couple of months and I have a bumpy road ahead, but for the first time in my life I feel ready to take control again. Leaving this chapter of my life behind is bittersweet, but it is definitely time. Words will never express the amount of love and gratitude I feel for all of the people who have been with me on this journey. Finally, I am able to recognize my truth and with time I am certain I will finish my story (with a bang!).
It has been a rough couple of months and I have a bumpy road ahead, but for the first time in my life I feel ready to take control again. Leaving this chapter of my life behind is bittersweet, but it is definitely time. Words will never express the amount of love and gratitude I feel for all of the people who have been with me on this journey. Finally, I am able to recognize my truth and with time I am certain I will finish my story (with a bang!).
You are incredible. It's been more than amazing to be a part of your journey, and I am so grateful.
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