I use my anger to fuel change

Lately I have been doom scrolling and reposting angry words to my Instagram story more often than I’d like to admit. Embarrassingly, I have even picked a few angry fights with people in the comment section. Due to the current state of the world (and the American political system), it’s been easy to get sucked into the chaos.

The main emotion I am experiencing these days is fear. It’s a type of fear that shows up in my life as red hot fiery anger. I have spent my entire life trying to be a nonreactive “good girl.” No one taught me how to healthily cope with fear that manifests as anger. My go-to strategy has been stuffing my anger deep below the surface and praying I don’t explode.

For me, social media is like a drug. It's good for distracting and numbing my emotions in the short term, but ultimately, it makes me feel like garbage. Social media causes a feeling of anger that skyrockets my heart rate and makes my armpits sweaty. Social media, I have learned, is not a safe place for my anger or my nervous system.

One of my favorite quotes on anger comes from Glennon Doyle:

“Anger delivers important information about where one of our boundaries has been crossed. When we answer the door and accept that delivery, we begin to know ourselves better. When we restore the boundary that was violated, we honor ourselves.”

This quote leaves me wondering if social media is one of the things violating my boundaries. Is this highly addictive app helping or hurting me? What would happen if I spent time away from Instagram? How else can I release some of the anger that has been living in my body for decades with no escape?

As much as I dislike feeling angry, I am learning how to use my anger and pent up negative energy to fuel change. The first change I am making is limiting the amount of time I spend on social media. Unfollowing triggering accounts also helps. Next, I can ease my political fears by educating myself on future candidates. The time I used to spend doom scrolling can be spent advocating for myself.

Additionally, I can channel my fear and anger by creating art, meditating, speaking to a therapist, listening to podcasts, engaging with a like-minded community, and participating in local peaceful protests. I can release pent up anger from my body with movement; yoga, bike rides, dancing, boxing, and long walks in nature all do the trick. I can also practice somatic therapy and deep breathing exercises to calm my nervous system.

The world around us is on literal fire. Everyone is afraid, everyone is angry. Answering the door and greeting the delivery of my anger with doom scrolling won't fuel change. Change happens when I restore the boundaries social media has violated and honor myself by choosing endless self-compassion.

I use my anger to fuel change.